Director: Ishiro Honda
Writer: Shinichi Sekizawa
Cast: Kenji Sahara, Machiko Naka, Tomonori Yazaki, Hideyo Amamoto, Sachio Sakai, Kazuo Suzuki, Ikio Sawamura, Shigeki Ishida, Yutaka Sada, Chotaro Togin, Yutaka Nakayama, Yoshifumi Tajima, Junichi Ito, Toru Mori, Toshiya Kurokawa, Hiroyuki Miyaoka, Nobuto Takahashi, Hidemi Ito, Ma-Chan the Midget, Yasuhiko Kakuyuki, Haruo Nakajima, and Midori Yamauchi
Composer: Kunio Miyauchi
Release Date: 12/20/1969
MPAA Rating: G
Tired of his lonely existence, latchkey child Ichiro Miki (Tomonori Yazaki) imagines himself on Monster Island with Minilla (now able to communicate using human speech) and Godzilla, who battles Ebirah, Kumonga, and Kamacuras while teaching his son to defeat Gabara—an ogre-like monster who represents a schoolyard bully of Ichiro. When kidnapped by bank robbers Okuda (Kazuo Suzuki) and Senbayashi (Sachio Sakai), Ichiro—inspired by Minilla’s courage—attempts to outmaneuver his unwitting captors before the police arrive.
Arguably the worst Godzilla movie ever made, All Monsters Attack (also known as Godzilla’s Revenge) should be avoided by all but the most enthusiastic of kaiju eiga fans. Especially embarrassing are Ichiro’s conversations with Minilla, who, in the English-dubbed version, could easily be mistaken for a second-rate caricature of Barney the purple dinosaur.
All Monsters Attack fails to include a variety of new and exciting monster battles with which to captivate the audience, instead recycling a preponderance of stock footage from previous kaiju installments (e.g. King Kong Escapes, Son of Godzilla, and Ebirah, Horror of the Deep) while depicting the adventures of Ichiro on Monster Island.
Plotting his escape, Ichiro creates many elaborate, extremely painful traps for Okuda and Senbayashi—a concept that would later be executed to a more humorous effect in Home Alone, a slapstick comedy that has little in common with a traditional Godzilla feature.
All Monsters Attack contains a commendable lesson on the value of defending oneself against bullies. Nevertheless, Ichiro’s abusive behavior in the final scene (i.e. pulling a malicious prank on a billboard painter) serves to undermine any positive messages explored in this offering.
Combining juvenile tropes with abysmal production values, All Monsters Attack deserves its reputation as the darkest and most appalling chapter in Toho’s Showa-era Godzilla series. Therefore, diehard kaiju buffs and casual viewers alike are advised to forgo this entry at all costs.
Overall Quality: 1/10
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